NO WAY, FACEBOOK!

GOOD FOR THEM! They must have read my blog from December 4th. (And perhaps the minds of millions of facebook users...but it's more fun thinking they read my blog). Dear Facebook users; You're welcome!

Friends

For over a year and a half now, Nick and I have been collecting every season of Friends on Dvd. Most recently we bought each other the last two seasons for Christmas... which completes our collection! When we have nothing else to do on any given night we play a few episodes and laugh our heads off. We don't have cable so we have relied on Friends to entertain us when all we want to do is relax and laugh.
Now, last night, as we began season 9 (yes, we opened a Christmas present early...shhh!) it dawned on me that we may actually be living vicariously through the amazing friendships in this show. Don't get me wrong, Nick and I both have great friends and we've even both experienced the same kind of close-knit community that the show portrays at one point or another in our lives. But currently, none of our close friends live within 3 hours of us so most of the time, we are all we have. I'm jealous that Rachel can walk across the hall and hangout with Monica and Chandler and that any one of them can walk into the coffee shop and have a best friend to sit down and chat with. I have CHERISHED these times in my life when I could walk into It's a Grind and sit down next to a smiling, familiar face and when I could walk across the street to the on-campus apartment of some of my best friends. Those times were amazing and fun and important.
We are all in constant search and in constant need of community. That's why I believe in the church. That's why I love the show Friends, too. That is also why Nick and I are starting a community group at our apartment in January. WE NEED FRIENDS! We don't meet friends in class anymore, we don't even have a group at either of our churches to attend anymore so we are intentionally trying to create community here in our little space in Birmingham. I hope it works.
We need each other. We need to talk about our fears and worries and joys. We even just need someone to go shopping with us or share a meal with us. People need people.
Last night I was flipping through my phone erasing names of people from my past whom I would never really need to call again. It was very interesting, and sad. Some of them I had to think really hard to remember! Mostly I was just flipping through looking at the names of people in my life NOW who ARE my friends.....just to remind myself that I have them. Lame, I know. But, my prayer for you and for Nick and for myself is that we are able to find true community....real friends. "I'll be there for you....when the rain starts to fall....I'll be there for you...."

silence

Wow....Nov. 14th was my last blog. I'm already sucking at this! I had the best intentions! Anyhoo, I was nudged by a friend to blog so here I am. No real topic in mind...
It's getting cold here...like, just today it turned cold. Or maybe I just haven't been noticing. I was cold in KY over Thanksgiving. As a matter of fact, Nick and I were on a mountain bike ride and I yelled for him to stop because I noticed flakes of white falling from the sky. I honestly thought it must have been pollen or dust from a fire or something but when I watched a flake land on Nick's black jacket, it melted. "IT'S SNOW!!"......"KISS ME!" I yelled. So right there on the bike trail in the woods we stopped to commemorate the first snow of our season with a kiss.
I keep seeing status comments on facebook from friends up north saying "{name} is loving the snow!" or "{name} is freezing in the snow." So that's fun. Glad it's not THAT cold here. Facebook...status...brings me to another point....
I really wish it didn't have an "is" after your name in the status field. Because sometimes Kelsey Howard Jones "was" and sometimes Kelsey Howard Jones "wants" or Kelsey Howard Jones "used to".....you get the picture. Dear Facebook creator....let me come up with my own verbs.
So this blog really has no point. We have a Christmas tree in our living room. One HALF of a strand of white lights keeps going out. That's what we get for getting the cheap ones. Frustrating. But it's still beautiful. Nick is sitting here next to me on the couch with my awesome guitar playing everything from Steve Ray Vaughn to John Mayer to Andrew Peterson...he's really good. I wish I was as good a guitar player as him. But I can school him at piano. Not that I'm keeping score. Sometimes I remind myself of Monica on Friends. But that is a whole other can of worms....I'll blog about that sooner or later. love, warmth, and christmas lights to you. :-)

I love Whole Foods

That's all. Yes, I love the new, way pricey, all-organic grocery store that is Whole Foods. It's fabulous. I was skeptical at first, thinking it would be the same stuff just over-priced, but I was wrong. It's awesome. And since I've been trying to health-up my nutrition, my cosmetics, my life in general, I have found Whole Foods to fit right into my organic, high fiber, fair trade, paraben-free life. Oh, and don't forget your grocery totes!

Where do we go?

I get antsy when I'm in one place for too long. Or at least that's how it seems looking back on my life. At age 26 I have lived in 4 cities in 4 different states for over a year in each place. KY, NJ, TN, and AL. Two weeks ago I celebrated my 1 year anniversary of living in Birmingham, Alabama. Now, I feel like reflecting and forecasting a bit....humor me.
Ahhh...Alabama. I must say, I had higher hopes but you have lived up to the stereotypes and generalizations that surround your backward state. I've found a careless, throw-your-litter-out-your-window, self-centered attitude among the working white lower and middle class. I've found a class and race separation that I naively thought no longer existed in America. The rich stay rich, poor stay poor....blacks stay in there neighborhoods, whites stay in theirs. It's also predominantly Republican. Go figure.
As Nick put it the other day "Alabama doesn't have a rich culture like some other states. Like Kentucky, they have Bourbon and horses and basketball and Henry Clay, Stephen Foster, and on and on...." To which his sister Katelyn replyed "yeah, we've got the whole gas-the-black people-thing though." (Bham was the heart of civil rights riots, etc...as if you didn't know) And, not much has changed, sadly.
But Nick and I have made a life here, serving the United Methodist Church (and hopefully Jesus and the community around us). Now, I had no connection to the Methodist church until Nick (and he was even a bit estranged from the denomination) but we have been welcomed, (hired), and loved into this community. And, now that I am starting to get settled, I start asking "so what's next?" Actually, to tell the truth, it's not that I'm settled here, it's more a feeling of unsettledness that has nagged at me since I moved here. And I can't speak for Nick, but I think he's felt it too. Who am I kidding, I know he has. I CAN speak for him. I've felt like Birmingham is temporary. How temporary is yet to be determined. But, temporary none the less. And that makes me wanna take some time to evaluate and plan the next steps of our lives.
So, do we move to Orlando and plug into the thriving arts and hip young adult community there? Do we move back to Nashville? Is there anything more for us there than when we left? Do we move to KY, my home where my dear parents of this only-child live and miss me? Where would we work there? Or, do we stay put....in Bham....indefinitely....and let the nag make it's home in our hearts?
It seems like decisions carry more weight now than they used to. Before it was just me, trying to make a life for myself, picking up truths, friends, and experiences along the way. Now, I am a WE. And one day this WE will be a family of 3 or 4. So, the decisions we make now will define our future and the future of others! That is huge! I can't make those kind of decisions on my own. So I pray, to a God who has always guided and cared for me, that He will continue the work He is doing in me and through me....wherever
and whenever....
and with whomever He wills.
Amen.

Of Monks and Monastaries

I spent this past weekend leading worship for a retreat at a Catholic monastary in Cullman, Alabama. A full-fledged Monastary/prep-school/tourist attraction/retreat center. I met a monk named Brother Brenden. I had spoken to him over the phone prior to our trip to inquire about Audio/visual capabilities of the center. This was a very funny and frustrating conversation as I tried to ask about sound system cords and outlets ...."oh, it's just a cable with an end that looks like you would plug it into your Ipod or Discman, a headphone jack basically....do you have that for audio for the projector? and then I'll also need a DI box, mic stand, etcetc..." I didn't realize until after I got off the phone with him that I had been talking to a MONK for goodness sake. He didn't know what a headphone plug looks like, and I'm sure he doesn't own an Ipod. I'm an idiot. Anyway...upon meeting Brother Brenden on Friday night I had a face to go with a voice and he was everything I had imagined a Monk to be. At the risk of sounding judgmental and harsh, I will just say, use your imagination.
I met another old monk with a walker and a black monk too. In CULLMAN, ALABAMA!!.....who knew?
The retreat was held at St. Bernard's Abbey http://www.stbernardabbey.com/ home to the Ave Maria Grotto (Grotto means "cave" in latin). During free time on Saturday a group of retreaters toured the Grotto....it's basically a walk through the woods where Brother Joseph so and so made a bunch of miniature cities, towers, memorials, etc. I'll insert a picture or too later because there is really no other way to describe this. It struck me as completely random, but I just kept thinking what else would a monk in Cullman, Alabama do to spend his days? Build a miniature Holy Land? Sure! Why not?!
Anyway....it was an interesting weekend. I was sans nicholas so I was a bit lonely and had a hard time sleeping without him next to me and with a big Crucifix hanging above my bed. Jesus IS a comfort to me... but naked, dying on the cross, is not the way I like to think of him the majority of the time...I like the RISEN Jesus myself. Catholics apparently like naked-Jesus dying above their beds. That's a whole other can of worms.
I'm glad I was exposed to this very hidden way of life. I have a lot of questions about it's purpose and necessity, but hey....It is in fact "the same Spirit working in all of us." Monks are cool.

Rainy Day Mood

Rain has this powerful affect on me. It's weird. If it rains steadily like it has since late last night, then my mood usually matches the weather. I feel lazy; it's too cold and wet to really get out and do anything. I feel frustrated; i can't stand getting splashed in the eyes with big 'ol drops of water or that misty, windy rain that slaps me around. And, when I DID get out today, I drove to a meeting that isn't happening until NEXT Tuesday (ughh..) and I went to a store that had NOTHING I was shopping for. AND let's talk about driving in the rain for a minute. No no no, let's talk about OLD people in Birmingham driving in the rain. (ok before I vent, I must tell you that I really enjoy the elderly, they're fun to talk to, wise, etc, etc and I know that one day, God-willing, I will be one but....) I am absolutely 100% for re-testing drivers over the age of 65. It's horrible. Especially in this old-money town in the middle of the day, IN THE RAIN. They wait til the very last second to cross two lanes of traffic, right in front of me, to turn....like they just realized they are where they need to be. They also drive no faster than about 35 mph anywhere! If that. Their reaction time is horrible, their vision is terrible....WHY do we allow them to get behind the wheel of one of the most deadly machines created by man??!!
Anyway, I'm done. It's the weather.

Our Fall Day of Fun!

Friday afternoon, while walking into Publix past their outdoor fall display, Nick asked "wanna get a pumpkin?".
Oh huh uh. You don't buy pumpkins at a grocery store! You PICK them from a pumpkin patch! duh.
"Let's find a local pumpkin patch tomorrow and go PICK one!" I suggested.
So we did. Here we are in the corn maze at Old Baker's Farm in Harpersville, Alabama. It was SUCH a fun day. There was a petting zoo, a giant hay mountain,
a hay ride, a cotton jump (they had a cotton field and they picked the cotton and put it in this cage for the kids to jump in!), and much more!
We hopped on the hay ride and rode to the field where we each picked out the perfect punkin. We buckled up the punkins and went home, carved one of them and made carmel apples! YUM. Happy Harvest!

Maybe it was the coffee

This is really weird for me. Nick just went to bed, before me. I am still wide awake, sitting on the couch and ready to put on a movie or something and he's brushing his teeth. This is weird.
If we don't go to bed together, I am the one who goes to bed first. Never the other way around.
He did only sleep for a total of an hour and a half last night. (still recovering) And he's probably only slept for a total of 8 hours in the past week. Poor thing. But for some reason I am strangely proud of the fact that I have not felt the first twinge of sleepiness and HE is falling over with exhaustion.
You see, for as long as I can remember I've always loved my sleep. LOVED it. Kept it sacred. I think this is because I know how I feel without it. Like shiz. I feel like complete shiz if I don't get at least 7 hours. It sucks kind of, but it's true. Lack of sleep affects my entire personality, my behavior, my hand-eye coordination...it's awful. So, I try to get it as much as I can.
I was also made fun of several times in high school and college for giving myself a curfew. I would carefully calculate what time I had to get up the next morning, how much sleep that would allow me, and then call it a night when it began to cut into sleep time. For a while I would be offended when friends gave me crap about needing sleep, but eventually I just accepted it as part of who I am (and you can make fun of me all day long, as long as I'm not tired I won't snap your head off or cuss you under my breath, I'll probably just laugh along with you). Sometimes this was mistaken as me being "responsible." Umm..not really, well, maybe, I mean actually it was just me wanting to sleep. It had little to do with my being responsible.
As a side note, this is really funny...since I began this blog nick has called for me from the bedroom twice. Once to tuck him in. Next to bring him his nasal spray. Both times he said "I want you in here with me." Hilarious. I really thought he was mocking me at first but he wasn't! Now he knows how I feel :-)

Relief

In my previous blog I said I would explain "more on that later." Well, here it is.
Today Nick was able to breathe clearly for a couple of hours after our morning doctor's visit. He's slowly coming back to life. We were having lunch together at Panera when he asked "can I have a bite of your bread?". I immediately tore off 3/4 of my bread and handed it to him to which he replied "woah, what's up with the generosity?". I went on to explain that for the past week I have been in the most servant-minded, generous frame-of-mind and even though he's feeling better, I'm still in the habit of catering to him. So when I said his time of surgery and recovery has been good for us both, I meant we have grown separately and as a couple.
He's learned how to rest. He spent almost 5 days straight on the couch in our living room. If you know Nick, this is nearly impossible for his ADD, OCD, hyper-active self. But, he has learned the benefit of resting. Although it's difficult for him, he says he wants to really try harder to keep a day during the week set aside soley for rest. We'll see!
And I have learned, or at least been reminded of how serving others is always easy for a couple of hours or even a couple of days but then it gets old. And frustrating. And annoying. And that's when it's real service. That's when the learning comes.
I have loved serving my husband. I LOVE him! And I'm thankful for the time we've had together learning and serving and resting. I AM glad he's better though!

Recovery

Laying on my couch, watching my husband sleep, bored out of my mind; this is the circumstance which leads me to create a new blog page.
I've been thinking about starting a new blog for a while now. I love writing. But, for the past year or so I've found it a struggle to pick up my journal and pen to write old-time style. I have not however, found it hard to pick up one of the FOUR Mac laptops that rest beneath our coffee table. ( I know, a bit extreme that we have 4 laptops...2 are personal, 2 are for work)
So, I thought, I'll write in my journal ON my laptop! Seems obvious. But, it's really not the same you see. I am aware that a Bazillion eyes could possibly read this at any moment since it is published on the worldwideweb....so I will not be writing many intimate, juicy details...I will be filtering my thoughts to make them blog-appropriate.
Nick just woke up so I won't be so bored anymore. He's recovering from surgery he had two days ago to correct his deviated septum. It's been a more difficult recovery than we expected but he will get better. Day by day. And, truthfully, this has been an awesome time for both of us. More on that later though. He's awake and it's time to quit writing. He also just looked over my shoulder and told me he started a blog a few weeks ago on here...by the same name! (soul mates)