AfterJune

Lovechild

2008-04-24T19:41:00.001-07:00

First of all, let me say that I am blogging because my hubby is playing video games, hogging the TV. Not that we have cable....but I could be watching a movie, or Friends...besides the point.

BUT, I did have an idea for a blog for the 2 people out there who actually might read this. Nick and I have FIN-ALL-Y started the process of recording together. It's taken quite a bit of emotional unpacking for me, growing together for the two of us, and sheer determination to set aside every Friday and Saturday for the next however-long-it-takes to record together. I've been writing more songs in the past few weeks/months than I have in probably 2 years and I am excited and happy and loving it.
I mention "emotional unpacking" because this is a fresh start on a an old desire/passion/calling and it's taken some working-through to get to where I could stomach trying it again. Sometime over the past 5 years or so I became cynical and broken when it came to "making it" in the music business and just decided to peace-out on the idea all together. Unfortunately, I also peaced-out on the art of it all too. This is not a good way to live for someone who is innately creative, innately musical. I come alive during and after the writing of a song. I come alive during and following the performance of a song. It's getting there that's the hard part.
Now, I've got someone to hold my hand through it and tell me I don't suck when I get down on myself and feel like quitting. I've got a cheerleader. AND, the best part, is I have my own recording engineer, drummer, bass and guitar player, and vocalist ALL-IN-ONE!!! WOAH! It's pretty awesome. The most important part though is that I'm realizing it's not about whether everyone else likes what you put out there. There is no Right or Wrong. It's just art. It doesn't have to pay well.
Anyway, we're calling ourselves Lovechild. It came from a conversation that we had on our way up to Nashville earlier this year. I said, "any album of ours will sound like the lovechild of a rocker and a folk singer"...and the rest is history.

AND, did I mention I get to write and record a jingle for Tamaron Honda in Birmingham?!!?!?!?!? Well, it was actually Nick's gig he got from a drummer-friend of his that knows we have a studio, but I told him it would make my life if he would let me sing it!! And he said I could and I can't wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (If this doesn't happen I will be so depressed and eat a pint of icecream on my own). My hopes are up!

PS....here is our new myspace page. We should have a song or two up in the next week or so.
www.myspace.com/lovechildsongs

Maria Shriver-Shwarzenegger(sp?)

2008-04-17T11:27:00.000-07:00

Yesterday afternoon while I was watching Chaz and Skylar, I landed on the Oprah show as I flipped through the channels. I had literally not seen 5 minutes of Oprah since probably 2006 which is funny to me since I used to LOVE watching Oprah. Anyway...she had Maria Shriver (whom I will refer to as MS)on as a guest speaking about her new book and a recent speach she made (I think, there were two kids in the room). I DID catch one suprising/intriquing tidbit though in the 5 minutes I watched. She spoke, hold-back tears, about a lesson she has just learned at the age of 51. The lesson she learned was that MS was not defined by what she did. She had grown up in the Kennedy family who she says had the philosophy of "go, go, go, do, do, do, be, be, be something important." When she lost her job as a TV journalist and became "1st lady" to the Governor of California she went through an identity crisis. She was no longer the one in the spotlight...she was playing 2nd-fiddle and she did not know how to exist that way. Eventually she learned how to BE mother, to really get to know her children, to listen, to be a mother to HER ailing mom, to listen, to just be.
I thought, how sad. This is a lady of many wordly accomplishments, fame, fortune and she had gone 51 years of her life thinking those things define her. How sad.
I am SO thankful, so blessed beyond measure that I had parents who loved me no matter if I succeeded or failed, parents who pushed me to never be lazy, to be a productive member of society, but to never let my job or success or other people define me and be my worth. AND, I have faith in a God who preaches that the last will be first and that the greatest in Heaven will be the weakest in the eyes of the world. THANK GOD I learned this lesson, and I still have the rest of my life to live with that wisdom.
I am not my resume. I am not my accomplishments. I am not defined by how people regard me. I am a daughter, a wife, and a beautiful, loved child of God.

Girlfriend, writing, and peace.

2008-04-07T12:18:00.001-07:00

My attitude about life and things has been really smooth lately. Smooth is the only word I can use to describe it. Circumstances in my life have been rather up and down with job-issues, but everything else is simply peaceful. I spent 3 days with a good girlfriend of mine shopping, writing a song, walking and discussing the frivolity of our circumstances and situations. It was good. It was good to have a friend to shop with me in stores that are my favorites and have her immediately understand why I love them. Silly? Maybe, but wonderful. It was good to write a song with no pressure for greatness, just simplicity, under-analyzing every lyric. It was good to have her here during a week that I got some more bad news from the church where I work. Good to have another sounding-board.
At the end of last week, Nick and I went up to Gatlinburg to spend a few days relaxing with my parents at the end of their week vacation. Nick and dad continued to bond over boy-stuff in the BassPro Shop and beer tastings at a brewery. Mom and I shopped for clothes and jewelry and such and the rain didn't get in the way of our night spent in the hot-tub or our meandering down mainstreet. No real fussing or pressure or nagging which sometimes comes with visits from out-of-town parents/in-laws. Just smoothness. Peace.
I think I am settling in to living. In the moment.
I'm almost to the year mark of my marriage and things are wonderfully joyful and peaceful in our simple lives. Even amongst the junk that life keeps throwing my way, I am content. I have this underlying peace even when tears fall and anxieties creep in. It's all gonna be okay. Just live.

2008-03-26T17:41:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time there was a girl, just a normal 20-something finding her way in the world. The closer and closer she felt to Right the farther and farther away she felt from the world...the more wrong she felt with her every move and decision. The eyes of friends cut her and their words judged her. She was humbled, but still convinced that her life was right. And it was good.

Living in the Tension

2008-03-12T17:56:00.000-07:00

I have had this thought on my brain for the past several weeks. I alluded to it in my facebook status and when I tried to explain it in words to some friends I pretty much failed. But I'm not a quitter....so I'll try again.
Sometimes I wake up and feel like a failure. I haven't achieved financial success...I'm not super skinny....my face is broken out...I have done NOTHING for society except play a few songs about God...that sort of thing.
Other days I feel like I'm doing well. Life is on track. I feel like the things I make my life about are worthy things. God is smiling on me and I'm smiling at me too.
More days than others though, I'm a failure. And, I'm learning that I ALWAYS WILL BE.
Now, not that I am depressed or negative or giving up or anything...It's not that at all. It's just that it's totally okay and totally expected that I'm a failure. It's not about success or failure. And it's not up to me.

I can't save the world.
I can't save myself.

And life is about so much more than that.

It's about living in the Grace that God has shown me. It's about not being good enough...but through faith in this crazy story of redemption through Jesus...I am justified. I AM good enough. Good enough at least in the GOD of this UNIVERSE's eyes. That's enough for me!

There is not enough good I can do that will justify me in God's eyes. There might be things I can do to look better in the eyes of people but... it's all meaningless. Absolutely meaningless. Stuff of the world vs. stuff of God.

People say that Christians are all hypocrites...and they are absolutely right! We ARE. We are living in the tension of not being good enough...of being sinful, disgusting, wrong people...who are covered and dependent on God....in other words...we're TRYING....

The tension is this. Free but captivated. Not good enough but good enough. Fully human but fully spirit.

It's a difficult way to live. But it is sweet.

Rat in the wall

2008-02-14T07:05:00.001-08:00

I thought this might be an interesting tid-bit ....a look into the never-boring life of Kelsey Jones.
I awoke Monday morning to the loudest scratching sound coming from above my head,just over our bedroom closet. "The neighbor upstairs must be dog-sitting" I mumbled to Nick who was also starting to stir. "Wait, babe, what is that?"....
Nick: "I don't know, go back to sleep..." (he was frustrated at my very awakened state)
Kelsey: "Nick, woah! oh my gosh, oh my gosh, it's not upstairs anymore.....it sounds like it's IN our closet now!! It must be a rat or a big mouse or a small dog or something!....I'm scared...uuuughhh...."
Nick (now sitting up to listen): "It sounds like a rat maybe"
So I, being the "man" of the house (really, the most disturbed by the idea of a freaking RAT in my apartment) got up to scope out the area. Tip-toe's around the corner, tip toe to open the closet....nothing....
I could still hear scratching but it was coming from INSIDE the wall. So I checked to see if there were any possible holes, vents, outlets that a mouse/rat/small dog could fit through. Nothing. If this rat was were it sounded like it was, then it was screwed.
So we went about our morning getting ready for work and every 4 minutes or so we would hear jumping around and scratching. Then, throughout the day the scratching sounds slowed to every 15 minutes or so to every hour to nothing by the time evening came. All day long I couldn't help but picture a dying rat trying to escape from the inside of our wall. Disgusting. Is it going to stink up our place when it dies? Did it maybe escape? Guess we'll just have to wait and see. It's been 3 days and I haven't smelled anything yet....but I can't walk by that wall without picturing in my head what might be inside...only a few inches from me.

Sunny days

2008-02-11T13:15:00.000-08:00

Does anyone else hear the chorus of "Walkin on Sunshine" in their heads lately? The weather has been absolutely BEAUTIFUL the past 2 or three days. I think it's sposed to end tomorrow, but MAN! I have been feelin GOOD! It's amazing the affect weather has on my mood! So why the heck am I sitting on my couch LOOKING at the gorgeous day through my windows? ?. I'm goin on a walk.

Writing, Recording and Singing

2008-01-31T07:52:00.000-08:00

I love to sing. That won't ever change, it's not something I will ever STOP doing. I can't. BUT, songwriting, although I've done it since I was a 5 year old, bored, only-child is something that has always come and gone with the winds of inspiration. Lately, I've been writing again....which gives me this huge sense of accomplishment when I get somewhere with a song. Now, to be fair, stepping back from my latest songs I'm not hugely thrilled with the amazing creativity of them, but just the mere fact that I'm taking time to write excites me. The song I'm most proud of lately is a song commissioned by the planners of this 6th grade retreat that Nick and I are leading next weekend. The theme of the weekend is "Transformers" but they didn't have a theme song! Enter Kelsey. Ever since I penned the wildly popular "Go the Extra Mile" for Lifeway's Centri-kid camp of the same name, I've prided myself on my children's-theme-song writing (notice a hint of sarcasm). But seriously....there is something so fun about writing kids songs! My song "Transforming" is the latest.....it's great fun to sing and play....I hope they like it next weekend!
This writing spurt has happened because Nick and I are trying to be intentional about getting an album recorded THIS YEAR. He has a studio for an office and we rarely take advantage of it for ourselves. Mostly because we haven't been writing like we should be...but now we are! Hopefully sometime in the near future we'll have something to show for it.
Which brings me to band names. If you have any suggestions please let me know. We cannot just be Nick and Kelsey Jones. That is lame. AfterJune was our original thought, but we're not so thrilled about that anymore. Anyway....
New songs, new duo, new band name. Yay for songwriting, singing, recording, and a husband who can do all of the above with me!

I have six minutes

2008-01-23T14:24:00.000-08:00

to write until my piano student gets here.

I got my hair cut today. It's very liberating. I've been feeling like change is in the air....like it's coming. A new job? A new town? Something. I got impatient waiting for it so I just made it happen a little bit on my own. Today. By cutting my hair...six inches of it, off.
Change is good, scary when you like where you are, but good. Keeps you on your toes. Reminds you that the only home we'll ever know comes later. Not here. Not earth.
I am happy with the life I've been given. It's wonderful most times. Even when it's horrible it adds color to the canvas. Gotta have the dark to appreciate the light.
I've been writing more songs lately. I made a New Years resolution to start journaling again and I haven't. I've been writing some song ideas down and working on those a bit....IN my journal....but no real entries. Why is getting alone with my thoughts so hard? I know it's rewarding AFTER I do it, but it's like pulling teeth to do it. Maybe I'll start tonight.
I hear little voices outside. Time for some music.

Kelsey and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.

2008-01-14T13:35:00.001-08:00

It has a happy ending though....

When I was in elementary school we read this book called "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day."
Ever had one of those? I did, last Friday. Now, before I rant, let me tell you that today, three days removed, I am in much better spirits and I fully recognize how petty and superficially "bad" last Friday was (I mean, no one died)....but nonetheless it was one of THOSE days.
Since I got married I have changed my name on all my bank cards, social security card, etc etc.....except my license. Now, I DID make one attempt around August to try to get a new license in Alabama with my new name on it. Currently, I have a Tennessee-issued license with my old name on it. Since my first attempt to get a new one sent me on a wild-goose-chase to three DMV's in the greater Birmingham area I was in no rush to try again. But, with a new year comes new resolutions and I had resolved to try once again for an AL license.
So, I woke up at 7AM on Friday morning (we all know it's best to be early to the DMV....at least that's what I learned on the first attempt) and my sweet husband even offered to go along with me to keep me company during the expected long wait. When we got there I went to the appropriate door, showed the lady my passport, old TN ID, and new social security card, I explained that the name-change thing and she gave me a number and told me to have a seat. So we did. We waited....

........and waited

..................and waited

And finally, 1 hour and 45 minutes later, my number was called. I walked in, handed another lady my stuff, and she asked if I had my marriage license with me. I said "no, I was told last time that I didn't need that." She rolled her eyes, pushed herself up from her seat and dragged into the office next door. When she came back she said "we have to have your marriage license. How are we supposed to know you didn't just change your name on your card wah wah wah wah...." To which I replied "ok, i have my OLD social security card, I have MR. JONES sitting outside, AND this is the SECOND time I have tried to do this! If I need to have FOUR forms of ID put it on your website!"
"well maaam, I've never even pulled up our website, people get a lot of conflicting info from it I think" she replied.
"then get the administrator to FIX IT!! OR put it on one of the 15 hand-written signs you have up on the door!!! This is ridiculous."
I grabbed my ID's out of her hands and stomped out.
Nick and I walked to the car....i was shaking....I let out a couple of words I wouldn't want Jesus to hear me say and then I started crying.
Now, I usually don't get THAT mad....or say the words I said that morning but I think my anger was really the tip of the iceberg of dealing with a few things like frustrations from getting my name changed, living in Alabama, living in Alabama, dealing with stupid people, dealing with stupid people in Alabama, seeing our US government be the most poorly run operation in the country.....you know....
SO...I will be keeping my TN ID until I move out of this state or until 2011 when it expires.
But this is not the end of the story.
To make myself feel better I thought I would go shopping. I grabbed a Bed, Bath and Beyond gift card and headed out the door. As soon as I pulled in to park I realized I had left the 20% off coupon at home....not a big deal to you maybe, but to me, yes. So I turned around and went back home.
It gets worse, when I got out of the car, I hit my head. Hard.
This began another crying fit and the feeling of "I give up, this day is trashed, I am going to go plant myself on the couch."
Enter Nick.
"It's only noon! You still have half of the day left! Let's hang out and do something fun!"
After some more convincing, we went on shopping attempt number two. The day got better. Nick bought me some new wine glasses and offered to make me dinner. When we got home he made me a bath and filled the bathroom with candles! He made pecan encrusted chicken for dinner, got a bottle of my favorite red wine, and then rented "Once" and brought me some milkduds from the movie store (my favorite!). ("Once" is awesome too, btw, if you haven't already seen it)
All was not lost. The day got better. And I am still Kelsey Lynn Howard in TN at least :-)

Kelsey and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.

2008-01-14T13:35:00.000-08:00

NO WAY, FACEBOOK!

2007-12-13T11:27:00.000-08:00

GOOD FOR THEM! They must have read my blog from December 4th. (And perhaps the minds of millions of facebook users...but it's more fun thinking they read my blog). Dear Facebook users; You're welcome!

Friends

2007-12-10T10:34:00.000-08:00

For over a year and a half now, Nick and I have been collecting every season of Friends on Dvd. Most recently we bought each other the last two seasons for Christmas... which completes our collection! When we have nothing else to do on any given night we play a few episodes and laugh our heads off. We don't have cable so we have relied on Friends to entertain us when all we want to do is relax and laugh.
Now, last night, as we began season 9 (yes, we opened a Christmas present early...shhh!) it dawned on me that we may actually be living vicariously through the amazing friendships in this show. Don't get me wrong, Nick and I both have great friends and we've even both experienced the same kind of close-knit community that the show portrays at one point or another in our lives. But currently, none of our close friends live within 3 hours of us so most of the time, we are all we have. I'm jealous that Rachel can walk across the hall and hangout with Monica and Chandler and that any one of them can walk into the coffee shop and have a best friend to sit down and chat with. I have CHERISHED these times in my life when I could walk into It's a Grind and sit down next to a smiling, familiar face and when I could walk across the street to the on-campus apartment of some of my best friends. Those times were amazing and fun and important.
We are all in constant search and in constant need of community. That's why I believe in the church. That's why I love the show Friends, too. That is also why Nick and I are starting a community group at our apartment in January. WE NEED FRIENDS! We don't meet friends in class anymore, we don't even have a group at either of our churches to attend anymore so we are intentionally trying to create community here in our little space in Birmingham. I hope it works.
We need each other. We need to talk about our fears and worries and joys. We even just need someone to go shopping with us or share a meal with us. People need people.
Last night I was flipping through my phone erasing names of people from my past whom I would never really need to call again. It was very interesting, and sad. Some of them I had to think really hard to remember! Mostly I was just flipping through looking at the names of people in my life NOW who ARE my friends.....just to remind myself that I have them. Lame, I know. But, my prayer for you and for Nick and for myself is that we are able to find true community....real friends. "I'll be there for you....when the rain starts to fall....I'll be there for you...."

silence

2007-12-04T18:43:00.000-08:00

Wow....Nov. 14th was my last blog. I'm already sucking at this! I had the best intentions! Anyhoo, I was nudged by a friend to blog so here I am. No real topic in mind...
It's getting cold here...like, just today it turned cold. Or maybe I just haven't been noticing. I was cold in KY over Thanksgiving. As a matter of fact, Nick and I were on a mountain bike ride and I yelled for him to stop because I noticed flakes of white falling from the sky. I honestly thought it must have been pollen or dust from a fire or something but when I watched a flake land on Nick's black jacket, it melted. "IT'S SNOW!!"......"KISS ME!" I yelled. So right there on the bike trail in the woods we stopped to commemorate the first snow of our season with a kiss.
I keep seeing status comments on facebook from friends up north saying "{name} is loving the snow!" or "{name} is freezing in the snow." So that's fun. Glad it's not THAT cold here. Facebook...status...brings me to another point....
I really wish it didn't have an "is" after your name in the status field. Because sometimes Kelsey Howard Jones "was" and sometimes Kelsey Howard Jones "wants" or Kelsey Howard Jones "used to".....you get the picture. Dear Facebook creator....let me come up with my own verbs.
So this blog really has no point. We have a Christmas tree in our living room. One HALF of a strand of white lights keeps going out. That's what we get for getting the cheap ones. Frustrating. But it's still beautiful. Nick is sitting here next to me on the couch with my awesome guitar playing everything from Steve Ray Vaughn to John Mayer to Andrew Peterson...he's really good. I wish I was as good a guitar player as him. But I can school him at piano. Not that I'm keeping score. Sometimes I remind myself of Monica on Friends. But that is a whole other can of worms....I'll blog about that sooner or later. love, warmth, and christmas lights to you. :-)

I love Whole Foods

2007-11-14T12:46:00.000-08:00

That's all. Yes, I love the new, way pricey, all-organic grocery store that is Whole Foods. It's fabulous. I was skeptical at first, thinking it would be the same stuff just over-priced, but I was wrong. It's awesome. And since I've been trying to health-up my nutrition, my cosmetics, my life in general, I have found Whole Foods to fit right into my organic, high fiber, fair trade, paraben-free life. Oh, and don't forget your grocery totes!

Where do we go?

2007-11-04T20:13:00.000-08:00

I get antsy when I'm in one place for too long. Or at least that's how it seems looking back on my life. At age 26 I have lived in 4 cities in 4 different states for over a year in each place. KY, NJ, TN, and AL. Two weeks ago I celebrated my 1 year anniversary of living in Birmingham, Alabama. Now, I feel like reflecting and forecasting a bit....humor me.
Ahhh...Alabama. I must say, I had higher hopes but you have lived up to the stereotypes and generalizations that surround your backward state. I've found a careless, throw-your-litter-out-your-window, self-centered attitude among the working white lower and middle class. I've found a class and race separation that I naively thought no longer existed in America. The rich stay rich, poor stay poor....blacks stay in there neighborhoods, whites stay in theirs. It's also predominantly Republican. Go figure.
As Nick put it the other day "Alabama doesn't have a rich culture like some other states. Like Kentucky, they have Bourbon and horses and basketball and Henry Clay, Stephen Foster, and on and on...." To which his sister Katelyn replyed "yeah, we've got the whole gas-the-black people-thing though." (Bham was the heart of civil rights riots, etc...as if you didn't know) And, not much has changed, sadly.
But Nick and I have made a life here, serving the United Methodist Church (and hopefully Jesus and the community around us). Now, I had no connection to the Methodist church until Nick (and he was even a bit estranged from the denomination) but we have been welcomed, (hired), and loved into this community. And, now that I am starting to get settled, I start asking "so what's next?" Actually, to tell the truth, it's not that I'm settled here, it's more a feeling of unsettledness that has nagged at me since I moved here. And I can't speak for Nick, but I think he's felt it too. Who am I kidding, I know he has. I CAN speak for him. I've felt like Birmingham is temporary. How temporary is yet to be determined. But, temporary none the less. And that makes me wanna take some time to evaluate and plan the next steps of our lives.
So, do we move to Orlando and plug into the thriving arts and hip young adult community there? Do we move back to Nashville? Is there anything more for us there than when we left? Do we move to KY, my home where my dear parents of this only-child live and miss me? Where would we work there? Or, do we stay put....in Bham....indefinitely....and let the nag make it's home in our hearts?
It seems like decisions carry more weight now than they used to. Before it was just me, trying to make a life for myself, picking up truths, friends, and experiences along the way. Now, I am a WE. And one day this WE will be a family of 3 or 4. So, the decisions we make now will define our future and the future of others! That is huge! I can't make those kind of decisions on my own. So I pray, to a God who has always guided and cared for me, that He will continue the work He is doing in me and through me....wherever
and whenever....
and with whomever He wills.
Amen.

Of Monks and Monastaries

2007-10-29T13:43:00.001-07:00

I spent this past weekend leading worship for a retreat at a Catholic monastary in Cullman, Alabama. A full-fledged Monastary/prep-school/tourist attraction/retreat center. I met a monk named Brother Brenden. I had spoken to him over the phone prior to our trip to inquire about Audio/visual capabilities of the center. This was a very funny and frustrating conversation as I tried to ask about sound system cords and outlets ...."oh, it's just a cable with an end that looks like you would plug it into your Ipod or Discman, a headphone jack basically....do you have that for audio for the projector? and then I'll also need a DI box, mic stand, etcetc..." I didn't realize until after I got off the phone with him that I had been talking to a MONK for goodness sake. He didn't know what a headphone plug looks like, and I'm sure he doesn't own an Ipod. I'm an idiot. Anyway...upon meeting Brother Brenden on Friday night I had a face to go with a voice and he was everything I had imagined a Monk to be. At the risk of sounding judgmental and harsh, I will just say, use your imagination.
I met another old monk with a walker and a black monk too. In CULLMAN, ALABAMA!!.....who knew?
The retreat was held at St. Bernard's Abbey http://www.stbernardabbey.com/ home to the Ave Maria Grotto (Grotto means "cave" in latin). During free time on Saturday a group of retreaters toured the Grotto....it's basically a walk through the woods where Brother Joseph so and so made a bunch of miniature cities, towers, memorials, etc. I'll insert a picture or too later because there is really no other way to describe this. It struck me as completely random, but I just kept thinking what else would a monk in Cullman, Alabama do to spend his days? Build a miniature Holy Land? Sure! Why not?!
Anyway....it was an interesting weekend. I was sans nicholas so I was a bit lonely and had a hard time sleeping without him next to me and with a big Crucifix hanging above my bed. Jesus IS a comfort to me... but naked, dying on the cross, is not the way I like to think of him the majority of the time...I like the RISEN Jesus myself. Catholics apparently like naked-Jesus dying above their beds. That's a whole other can of worms.
I'm glad I was exposed to this very hidden way of life. I have a lot of questions about it's purpose and necessity, but hey....It is in fact "the same Spirit working in all of us." Monks are cool.

Rainy Day Mood

2007-10-23T11:56:00.000-07:00

Rain has this powerful affect on me. It's weird. If it rains steadily like it has since late last night, then my mood usually matches the weather. I feel lazy; it's too cold and wet to really get out and do anything. I feel frustrated; i can't stand getting splashed in the eyes with big 'ol drops of water or that misty, windy rain that slaps me around. And, when I DID get out today, I drove to a meeting that isn't happening until NEXT Tuesday (ughh..) and I went to a store that had NOTHING I was shopping for. AND let's talk about driving in the rain for a minute. No no no, let's talk about OLD people in Birmingham driving in the rain. (ok before I vent, I must tell you that I really enjoy the elderly, they're fun to talk to, wise, etc, etc and I know that one day, God-willing, I will be one but....) I am absolutely 100% for re-testing drivers over the age of 65. It's horrible. Especially in this old-money town in the middle of the day, IN THE RAIN. They wait til the very last second to cross two lanes of traffic, right in front of me, to turn....like they just realized they are where they need to be. They also drive no faster than about 35 mph anywhere! If that. Their reaction time is horrible, their vision is terrible....WHY do we allow them to get behind the wheel of one of the most deadly machines created by man??!!
Anyway, I'm done. It's the weather.

Our Fall Day of Fun!

2007-10-20T17:00:00.000-07:00

Friday afternoon, while walking into Publix past their outdoor fall display, Nick asked "wanna get a pumpkin?".
Oh huh uh. You don't buy pumpkins at a grocery store! You PICK them from a pumpkin patch! duh.
"Let's find a local pumpkin patch tomorrow and go PICK one!" I suggested.
So we did. Here we are in the corn maze at Old Baker's Farm in Harpersville, Alabama. It was SUCH a fun day. There was a petting zoo, a giant hay mountain,
a hay ride, a cotton jump (they had a cotton field and they picked the cotton and put it in this cage for the kids to jump in!), and much more!
We hopped on the hay ride and rode to the field where we each picked out the perfect punkin. We buckled up the punkins and went home, carved one of them and made carmel apples! YUM. Happy Harvest!

Maybe it was the coffee

2007-10-18T22:45:00.000-07:00

This is really weird for me. Nick just went to bed, before me. I am still wide awake, sitting on the couch and ready to put on a movie or something and he's brushing his teeth. This is weird.
If we don't go to bed together, I am the one who goes to bed first. Never the other way around.
He did only sleep for a total of an hour and a half last night. (still recovering) And he's probably only slept for a total of 8 hours in the past week. Poor thing. But for some reason I am strangely proud of the fact that I have not felt the first twinge of sleepiness and HE is falling over with exhaustion.
You see, for as long as I can remember I've always loved my sleep. LOVED it. Kept it sacred. I think this is because I know how I feel without it. Like shiz. I feel like complete shiz if I don't get at least 7 hours. It sucks kind of, but it's true. Lack of sleep affects my entire personality, my behavior, my hand-eye coordination...it's awful. So, I try to get it as much as I can.
I was also made fun of several times in high school and college for giving myself a curfew. I would carefully calculate what time I had to get up the next morning, how much sleep that would allow me, and then call it a night when it began to cut into sleep time. For a while I would be offended when friends gave me crap about needing sleep, but eventually I just accepted it as part of who I am (and you can make fun of me all day long, as long as I'm not tired I won't snap your head off or cuss you under my breath, I'll probably just laugh along with you). Sometimes this was mistaken as me being "responsible." Umm..not really, well, maybe, I mean actually it was just me wanting to sleep. It had little to do with my being responsible.
As a side note, this is really funny...since I began this blog nick has called for me from the bedroom twice. Once to tuck him in. Next to bring him his nasal spray. Both times he said "I want you in here with me." Hilarious. I really thought he was mocking me at first but he wasn't! Now he knows how I feel :-)

Relief

2007-10-16T12:34:00.000-07:00

In my previous blog I said I would explain "more on that later." Well, here it is.
Today Nick was able to breathe clearly for a couple of hours after our morning doctor's visit. He's slowly coming back to life. We were having lunch together at Panera when he asked "can I have a bite of your bread?". I immediately tore off 3/4 of my bread and handed it to him to which he replied "woah, what's up with the generosity?". I went on to explain that for the past week I have been in the most servant-minded, generous frame-of-mind and even though he's feeling better, I'm still in the habit of catering to him. So when I said his time of surgery and recovery has been good for us both, I meant we have grown separately and as a couple.
He's learned how to rest. He spent almost 5 days straight on the couch in our living room. If you know Nick, this is nearly impossible for his ADD, OCD, hyper-active self. But, he has learned the benefit of resting. Although it's difficult for him, he says he wants to really try harder to keep a day during the week set aside soley for rest. We'll see!
And I have learned, or at least been reminded of how serving others is always easy for a couple of hours or even a couple of days but then it gets old. And frustrating. And annoying. And that's when it's real service. That's when the learning comes.
I have loved serving my husband. I LOVE him! And I'm thankful for the time we've had together learning and serving and resting. I AM glad he's better though!

Recovery

2007-10-12T16:57:00.000-07:00

Laying on my couch, watching my husband sleep, bored out of my mind; this is the circumstance which leads me to create a new blog page.
I've been thinking about starting a new blog for a while now. I love writing. But, for the past year or so I've found it a struggle to pick up my journal and pen to write old-time style. I have not however, found it hard to pick up one of the FOUR Mac laptops that rest beneath our coffee table. ( I know, a bit extreme that we have 4 laptops...2 are personal, 2 are for work)
So, I thought, I'll write in my journal ON my laptop! Seems obvious. But, it's really not the same you see. I am aware that a Bazillion eyes could possibly read this at any moment since it is published on the worldwideweb....so I will not be writing many intimate, juicy details...I will be filtering my thoughts to make them blog-appropriate.
Nick just woke up so I won't be so bored anymore. He's recovering from surgery he had two days ago to correct his deviated septum. It's been a more difficult recovery than we expected but he will get better. Day by day. And, truthfully, this has been an awesome time for both of us. More on that later though. He's awake and it's time to quit writing. He also just looked over my shoulder and told me he started a blog a few weeks ago on here...by the same name! (soul mates)